Cruel Angel Theses

A reference-laden quote needs a little something to give it context, and considering how I’ve learned to not look at harem and its deriatives with derision anymore (I credit CCYoshi partially for that accomplishment, who, coincidentally, has an awesome new blog over at Mega Megane Moé — we’re hosting buddies now!), it seems all the more apt.

Make your choice, adventurous Stranger;
Strike the bell and bide the danger,
Or wonder, till it drives you mad,
What would have followed if you had.

This is, of course, the premise by which I’m watching the more “dubious” picks this season. Considering how subs are going to be and have been frighteningly efficient due to the alliance of m.3.3.w + BakaWolf + Ayako, passing up on what could be the ef of Winter seems patently obtuse. I mean, all the cool kids are doing it, so it should be fine, right?

Rosario + Vampire was one such series that I could’ve skipped entirely, were it not for the nagging feeling that lightning couldn’t possibly strike twice. I’m looking at Dragonaut, which went from Initially Promising to Linkin Park: The Anime (Feat. Dragons), but as it was an anime-original work after all, the fault lies entirely on Gonzo. R+V, however, is based on a manga well-known enough to have its purists going up in arms over about the adaptation’s style, and I felt it couldn’t hurt to check out a few episodes.

you usually see this at the second-to-last, not second episode

One major complaint of mine with harem has always been what I’d like to call the “Commitment Cockblock”, which basically consists of the protagonist not making much visible effort to show his affection for the main girl, which is where the “spineless wimp” stereotype comes from. What happen for the rest of the series makes for a painfully predictable story, in which episode after episode is spent bouncing the protagonist between the rest of the girls like a fast-paced game of pinball.

It was shocking to see this being ignored in R+V. I don’t know about you, but it’s refreshing to not have a couple in denial for once, especially when you know that it’s being drawn out on purpose. This is why I feel harem has as many detractors as it has fans — while it’s debatable as to whether the term “filler” should be extended to a genre where the point isn’t so much the relationship as it is the process of getting there (with the odd pantyshot or accidental grope in between), if there’s one thing people can’t stand, it’s nothing happening, slice of life aside.

nothing like open rivalry to get things going

A series with this much development in such a short time can’t go wrong. In a mere two episodes Tsukune and Moka take what most harem couples take 10 out of 13 or 22 out of 26 episodes to accomplish. It’s revolutionary in that the show should feel a lot more like a real high school romance with several faux love interests thrown in for slapstick and variety, as opposed to the overplayed alternative that is its sordid, wish-fulfilment counterpart.

Not a single minute is wasted. R+V’s production values are like what one would come to expect from Gonzo, with nary a misshapen face or oddly-angled limb in sight. Everything, from the sound effects, to the music (a notch above Goshuushou-sama Ninomiya-kun’s, which was in a class of its own to begin with), to the random bat mascot that occasionally hovers in front of the screen with random commentary or fourth-wall breaking of some sort — it all comes together in a cohesive package so entertaining, it ought to be subbed with an I Can’t Believe It’s Gonzo! watermark on every frame.

In comparison, Kimi ga Aruji de Shitsuji ga Ore de was a painful affair. The experience was like being stripped of all your skin before being dragged behind a Bugatti Veyron along a highway heaped with salt, and I’m not exaggerating, either: while anime always seems to be worse than it is according to the bastions of taste, I mean, er, bloggers around this time, there’s something to be said about a show that manages to mess up the fail-safe harem trinity of fanservice, incest, and violence by means of a patchwork design akin to Frankenstein.

this was my face while watching KimiAru

There’s being random and there’s being random for absolutely no bloody reason whatsoever. While a lot of comedy or slice of life shows thrive on its characters doing random things, here it felt tacked on and artificial. A random meganekko masturbating in the middle of the street after bumping into a guy by accident? Check. Aforementioned guy frequently resting his face in his older sister’s cleavage and constantly delivering creepy pseudo-incestuous one-liners? Check. A girl sexually harassing her younger sister with whipped cream and innuendo? Check. All of that’s in the first two episodes, and more.

You get the idea. KimiAru is a great example of why the production values of anime in the 90s should have stayed in the 90s. While I managed to suffer through half of Night Wizard before deciding it wasn’t for me, KimiAru upped the ante with regards to my high tolerance for badly-made anime — I found myself rejoicing when the eyecatch came around, and only barely survived the 40 minutes before wiping the files off my harddrive in disgust.

and my reaction after it was all over

It goes without saying that I won’t be watching this anymore, but there’s bound to be one of those every season, I suppose. KimiAru takes the cake for being one of the most poorly-produced things I’ve had the misfortune of viewing in the past year or so, and even that’s putting things lightly. NW almost seemed like an action-packed, nail-biting blockbuster compared to it.