Cruel Angel Theses

Good day, peasants! My name is Owen, I’m an elitist anime blogger, and I hope you enjoy my even more elitist autumn review written in haiku form. None of that filthy commoner prose for me — if the Japanese can convey such great meaning through a 5/7/5 syllable form, so can I! Please enjoy my high-falutin’ ruminations while noting that I go through the same motions at the beginning of every season: toting a sandwich board on the streets while proclaiming that the end of anime is nigh, waxing lyrical about the good old days, and judging every new anime airing as bad until proven otherwise.

What’s that you say, about a well-told story or compelling characterisation? Overrated! Three words: different character designs. I’ll disregard anime critically acclaimed by my peers if the animators so much as dare to draw a female character’s eyes oversize, give her a cup size smaller than a C, or make her appealing to the opposite sex in any way whatsoever. I mean, substance and aesthetics are mutually exclusive, aren’t they? Pretty anime is just that and nothing else. And as for porn game adaptations, well… do people die when they’re killed?

So, without further ado, sit back and enjoy this elitist autumn preview, finely distilled to a pure essence by yours truly, the paragon of good taste. It’s fastidiously facetious!

Gotcha.

In case you didn’t realise, this was my taking the mickey out of bateszi, who was taking the mickey out of, well… just about everybody in his recent post, and yes, he knew this was coming. I messaged him about it. No thanks to hashihime’s extremely helpful and comprehensive director-who-did-this-also-did-X preview, I’ve a pretty good idea of what I want to get started on this Autumn. Well, everything here except Casshern and Kurogane no Linebarrel, which leaves me with nine shows to anticipate.

[Kuroshitsuji]
heard all this before
they called him Artemis Fowl
maybe true tears II?

[Casshern Sins]
seen the live-action
like anime in real life
superior soundtrack

[Clannad ~after story~]
best Key work ever
more family less crying please
delicious Kyou too.

Stay in the past and all you'll wish for are better days long gone.

I guess we all need a reality check of some sort whenever a new season pops around, rears its ugly head, and we start pecking at our keyboards — my parody, when juxtaposed against bateszi’s, was meant to highlight the hilarious differences between polar extremities of our dumb and diverse fanbase. Unfortunately, the man himself hardly qualifies for the profile I just wrote as a result of him telling me not too long ago about watching true tears soon; something about new-old anime looking attractive at this time of the year.

[ef -a tale of melodies-]
first should have been called
ef -a tale of mammaries-
believe in Shinbo

[Gundam 00 2nd season]
he’s turning Gundam
girly men hot babes big mechs
overcompensate.

[Kurogane no Linebarrel]
mecha and Gonzo
it’s heaven and hell, let’s rock!
no more dragons please

Look to the future too much and you won't realise what's behind you.

But we’ve been through this tried-and-true argument of anime diversity. Or at least I have. Kind of like Code Geass. On one end the past, on the other the future, and yours truly here fighting the good fight one word at a time on this blog trying to tell both sides that no, either extreme isn’t good. Where’s the fun in watching hundreds and hundreds of shows that are essentially the same thing? Not me. I like variety, which is why purely indie and purely mainstream tastes both bore me to tears.

[Kurozuka]
Paul said a must-watch
rising up to the challenge
before that, manga

[One Out]
yes I too would like
gametheory in my baseball
sharp faces are sharp

[Shikabane Hime]
sad reality
watching because of Gainax
…like Kyo-Ani fans.

The best alternative in this situation? A marriage of both!

Balance. I know all about the argument against that, so spare me the lecture and listen: I notice that the less variety someone watches, the more likely they are to stay huddled in their respective corners of the internet, not really venturing out of their cosy little comfort zones. What kind of an experience is that? Not a very friendly or human one, is what, and I’m not just talking about the indier-than-indie types up in their chilly ivory towers — surely your average 2D-complex guy must feel ronery at some point, and I’m not talking about that type of roneriness either.

[Skip Beat]
no clue what this is
Jenny told me to watch it
wouldn’t hurt to try

[Tytania]
not quite Galactic
would be stupid to miss this
acclaim imminent

Either way, wow, it’s already Autumn. Are things getting better as time goes or what? I remember the lineup of shows not being as colourful, mixed-up, or productive as last year, and I hope this increase in quality’s maintained from here on out, even if it means having to watch more, analyse more, and blog more while squeezing all of that into a tight schedule when university starts again come January. It’s good to be back, in any case. No time like the present.